Good night of sleep tips we all may contribute.

I don't know about you but I drink a shitload of water leading all the way up to hitting the matress. Unfortuanrtly this comes at a price. Yes, I have to piss in the middle of the night,100% sure thing, no doubt guaranteed.  The trip to the bathroom is a journey - especially in the middle of a good dream that will never resume. Returning to bed and falling back to sleep is challenging. Pretty sure I'm not alone here.

Sooooo, I had reached my limit with the post piss tossing and turning and bought a sand beach bucket. This 2 dollar item is approximatly 9 inches in diameter and sits perfectly on the night stand next to my bed. All you have to do is roll off the matress, stand over the tub and piss away, even with eyes closed. Wood? No problem - just hold the bucket at a slight angle and drain away. Your piss/wake time is cut in half. Just make sure you empty it before anybody stops by and sees a disgusting portable urinal filled with piss next to your bed.

8-10 hours of sound sleep. 2 bucks.

Guys with wives and full time g/f's be cautious. Serious possibility of a breakoff.

.....If a guest does happen to see your bedside piss bucket and question, you tell them the previous night you had an upset stomach from drinking light beer and eating salad with blue cheese dressing.

They'll believe you.

Another helpful tip that I was taught by an expert in the field is, if you are unable to fall asleep after 20-30 minutes. Get OUT of bed. Walk out of your bedroom and turn a bright light on and do anything that is NON stimulating. (do a few dishes, clean the toaster, wash a mirror.....whatever).

Return to bed and try again.

Another tip is never watch TV in bed. Your brain then learn to associate your bed and your bedroom with things other than sleep. Chics always watch the tube on the matress, that's why they have bigtime sleep issues.

If none of this works then simply reach for a bottle of honey mustard, a bottle of blue cheese dressing and smear both all over your balls at a vigorous pace. Pound a shitty Amstel Light when this step is complete.