Connor McDavid will...

Beat Boston in OT

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My man Murphy ! The Murph ! I still can’t believe that you took a shit in that punch bowl that one time ! And Lisa with the one big tit and the one little tit just thought it was another piece of fruit floating in it like the lemons and the oranges . What a great party !

That dumb bitch didn’t even notice that the shoe shaped piece of manure standing still in there like a defeated battleship came from within the wretched inner sanctums of your butt .

I didn’t have the heart to tell her bro . And even after she locked herself in the bathroom because she was violently throwing up , in between her yelling and complaining that the punch bowl must have been “ spiked “ with something bad , I still couldn’t bring myself to reveal the mystery of the one diabolical secret ingredient in that liquid concoction .

your ass played a prank that day buddy .

That will go down in the annals of history as an “ Anal Epiphany “ .

the day your rotten smelly poop ejecter turned an innocent bowl of fruit juice and liquor into the greatest shit show any frat party has ever seen .

Your butt should be bronzed for that display of poopsmanship . But then it would be hard for you to walk I guess . So maybe we should wait till your dead . Because it’s prowess and tenacity for pulling off one of the greatest stunts humankind has ever seen in regards to Fece-fying a beverage should be honored and respected .

so Murph , please accept your induction into the “ Spiking a PunchBowl with a Big Fat Dookie Hall of Fame “……

cuz you earned it pal .

And you turned it . Like a large cement mixer , if a cement mixer mixed Shit , and by you letting it out , you helped lay the groundwork for a prank that would leave the Impractical Jokers jealous and envious , and scowling for days ……..

Murphy