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#1
With the Tigers win from yesterday, Vegas is in shambles..as approximately 273,044 Blue lobsters lost their lives in the hands of Chef Phandi Haquoon. This is almost as devastating as the choice of many Oakland residents to jump off the Golden Gate Bridge without parachutes.
Today, Vegas renews her Platinum membership with Jo Anne's Pilates Club, and takes part in an extended ankle grabbing session as they continue to get ravaged by guests on the easy Dodgers win today with Greinke on the mound. The Lions at the MGM Grand have not been fed for eleven days and are now taking swipes at tourists through the cage. Fourteen year old Julio is walking by the area with a balloon in his hand, when the oldest female Lion claws and pops it...causing Julio to cry hysterically. His parents try to soothe him by using tissue paper to wipe tears and nasal mucus of his chin and lips.
Meanwhile in Southern California, everyone is violently fist pumping while bumping 2pac in their convertibles. There is a vicious roar at Dodger Stadium as every fan waves their dirty towel when the score reads 16-0 LAD-ATL by the third inning. Alex Wood is driven off the mound while Grienke shoots peace signs from the dugout. In Atlanta, everyone is looting stores after the Coca Cola factory has a spill and drowns several nearby peach plantations. Laqueefa is spotted near one of the plantations looking to load up on peaches before flying off. "deez peaches be lookin all rotten and all. Where da Welch's farm at?" she exclaims in frustration, but nobody cares because everyone is violently cashing in on the Dodgers and continuing to bareback Vegas for the second night in a row.
Take UNDER 6.5 -110
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