@masterkush
I agree but it becomes a fog. Again two years ago I can barely recall wtf I was doing. Honestly I go through the history and I am like who was that person and what the phuck where they thinking even the bets made no sense. Really was like I checked out from reality. Probably was thinking "OK, if I win this one big bet I will chill" but to be honest I really don't recall what I was thinking and why everything just took off, it was just a strange blurry time in my life with a lot of changes and negative stuff going on in my family. I guess I did it to have control over something and maybe was trying to make myself feel good as a few of my family members died and I had to comeback and live in the States again. I just didn't fit here anymore and after being away so long my friends had moved or were involved with other things my younger family members who were like 15 when I went to live in Asia where now college graduates with kids. It really threw me off but sports are a constant. I mean after We are dead and buried , All of Us the Cowboys vs Eagles will still be a big game in Philly, Texas vs Oklahoma will be a big deal in CFB, Duke vs UNC will be a big deal. The names change but these sports are constant even as everything else changes. It is really hard to just stop. Sounds easy. I remember a member here that posts a lot and he put his betting tickets on YouTube and he had like 4 bets for a total of $80 and I couldn't believe it. I just would never make a $20 bet. Why would I waste my time. This guy actually spent the time to drive to a casino wait in line and place 4 $20 bets a on the Chiefs in this year's Superbowl. I couldn't wrap my head around that but maybe just maybe he was a $1000 bettor but went bust, I don't know. Again, watch or download Action from HBO. These "Top Gamblers" will die young for sure, their quality of life has to be terrible as they are overweight and look 20 years older than their age many are very lonely people, it is sad as shite. They all are trying to be podcasters to make money. One guy had no furniture in his tiny shitbox in Vegas the other guy was just using a suite in a casino. The most truthful guy is a financial analyst who said with AI and algorithms over the long term and the vig it is impossible in today's world to make decent income over the long haul. You may have a great year maybe three but to think you will be in positive money over 6 years given how technology has taken over line making it just isn't going to happen. I just say the best of luck to you. Try and limit your Amounts. People say limit games but if you're only betting $50 a game then you could bet 25 games vs $15,000 on one game. I don't have the answer but if you can take all that energy and apply it to a different venture that would be great. Instant gratification of any kind is a bitch and it rewires the brain. I don't deal with bookies besides a friend who I will just call and ask which side he needs. Usually turns out to be the winning side when everyone is piling on ond team. It usually doesn't match up with the % you find on line, sometimes it does. Anyway, weather is getting nice time to shift gears if you can. Again Good Luck and hope you find the least painful way to pull yourself out of where you are at the moment.When you do make sure you don't slide back down. As they say remember the pain, don't have selective amnesia