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Lets hear your best hooker story

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Posted: #26
fruity.......
 
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Posted: #27
Quote Originally Posted by Cee_MoNeY:

This is not mine but a buddies of mine story..........Actually 2 of my buddies storys. I am still 24 and not at that point where i have to pay for poon yet...I will someday...Asian massage parlor for sure.
 
story #1
My buddy  is a Marine and will visiting Califonia he picks up a hooker near the beach (he was by himself)...So he takes her to his car and gives her $100 to fuck. He says she was cute but he would fuck any thing that has a hot hole. So he was getting the best fuckin blowjob of his life and then wants to fuck.. The chick was wearing a skirt I guess and he wants to fuck her but she keeps on telling him to fuck her in the ass. SO he  then grabs for her box and grabs a big hot steaming bowl of cock.... SO then he tell me, he said fuck it...Let the she-man finish sucking his cock and peace. Why he would admit this story baffles me to this day. And I so fucking believe..
 
Number #2----This story is wrong not juicy
My buddie in Mexico picks up a decent chick to fuck in mexico for $30 bucks. Takes her in the back but yet had dick problems the whole time. He said he went through  like 4 condoms. Whats fucked up is his chick was at this club called the Jungle waiting for him with her friends.... Buddy got some balls.
 
 

The man with a dick for an avatar hasn't paid for sex... hrmmmphh, I find that unbelievable.

Tell you this... its not an age thing... I got a bunch of youngsters... always at the spot in Inglewood. And we all got slit for free... if we wanna... something about that strange homey!!!!'

 

 
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Posted: #28
i dont think i have a best hooker story
 
boys town south of mccallen tx
late 90's
 
goat for dinner
$10 for the rubber
$40 for the box
 
i found the economics of the deal a bit skewed, id a pay'd more for the rubber
 
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Posted: #29
well, this isn't the best but here it goes.....i was turnin' tricks under the turnpick in the ironbound section of newark when this well heeled mid-aged guy in a mercedes pulls over looking for action. so i take him back behind the incinerater and ask him to get out of the car were we will both be more relaxed. i undid his belt and pants which quickly dropped down to his ankles. i then ran a razor across his throat. as he lay there dying, i rubbed one out on his face! i clipped his wallet which had a sizeable amount of cash in it and burned up his credit card at the local best buy. today, i'm still driving that sweet mercedes.....when i think back to those whacky times it still never ceases to make me laugh!
 
 
 
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Posted: #30
Quote Originally Posted by glennszy:

well, this isn't the best but here it goes.....i was turnin' tricks under the turnpick in the ironbound section of newark when this well heeled mid-aged guy in a mercedes pulls over looking for action. so i take him back behind the incinerater and ask him to get out of the car were we will both be more relaxed. i undid his belt and pants which quickly dropped down to his ankles. i then ran a razor across his throat. as he lay there dying, i rubbed one out on his face! i clipped his wallet which had a sizeable amount of cash in it and burned up his credit card at the local best buy. today, i'm still driving that sweet mercedes.....when i think back to those whacky times it still never ceases to make me laugh!
 
 

 

 

 

 
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Posted: #31
 
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Posted: #32
Quote Originally Posted by glennszy:

well, this isn't the best but here it goes.....i was turnin' tricks under the turnpick in the ironbound section of newark when this well heeled mid-aged guy in a mercedes pulls over looking for action. so i take him back behind the incinerater and ask him to get out of the car were we will both be more relaxed. i undid his belt and pants which quickly dropped down to his ankles. i then ran a razor across his throat. as he lay there dying, i rubbed one out on his face! i clipped his wallet which had a sizeable amount of cash in it and burned up his credit card at the local best buy. today, i'm still driving that sweet mercedes.....when i think back to those whacky times it still never ceases to make me laugh!
 
 

you crazy kids

 
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Posted: #33
......and i'm not really big on pets either
 
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Posted: #34
It puts the lotion on its skin or it gets Banned again.....
 
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Posted: #35
hide the women and children (and pets) glennszys on the loose
 
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Posted: #36
It puts on the lotion or else it gets the hose.........
 
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Posted: #37
"......put the fucking lotion in the basket!"
that is cute.........
 
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Posted: #38
Quote Originally Posted by glennszy:

well, this isn't the best but here it goes.....i was turnin' tricks under the turnpick in the ironbound section of newark when this well heeled mid-aged guy in a mercedes pulls over looking for action. so i take him back behind the incinerater and ask him to get out of the car were we will both be more relaxed. i undid his belt and pants which quickly dropped down to his ankles. i then ran a razor across his throat. as he lay there dying, i rubbed one out on his face! i clipped his wallet which had a sizeable amount of cash in it and burned up his credit card at the local best buy. today, i'm still driving that sweet mercedes.....when i think back to those whacky times it still never ceases to make me laugh!

i, unlike all the fucking idiots above, who laugh at everything udner the sun, find nothing funny in your post

there is actually no humor in this post nor is anything in it funny. in fact, to a normal person, youve been downgraded to the level of : Charlie Manson/creepy sex offender.
you are fucked up in the head

there are 3 types of people that post of these message boards:

-sick creepy assed motherfuckers who still live in mama's basement, and can be seen every night at 8pm with binoculars stalking and "peeping tomming" there 14 year old neighor
(penaty box nation)

- fat loser virgins

- degenerates who enjoy sports

Creepy fucker, you are all three. if anyone wonders why you dont have friends in real life, they can see this post!!

 
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Posted: #39
Quote Originally Posted by fruit20:

20 yrs ago i was visiting friend in d.c for weekend....he had a thing for hookers.....we went to bars..on sat night....we got smashed on way home we smoked a funny cig...i passed out....that fucker went to hooker row.......busted....under cover cop....and they busted me...spent the weekend in jail.......went to court......i was found guilty..the judge said....if you werent picking up ....and i quote...box...you wouldnt have been in the car....my friend even said i wasnt involved...just drunk and passed out....that shit cost me 800.00 with fines and bull shit..........at the price of a hooker then about 50.00....look at how many blow jobs i payed for and....didnt get

cool dude! i used to live in DC so i can relate! unfortuantely, thats a bad thing for you, becuase anyone that did would know this whole post is a giant lie. i love how you just said "20 years ago, and DC", a very arbitrary time period and our nations capital. what a coincidence!

"hooker row" this doenst exist, nor did it ever. prostitution is actually quite low in DC, alot lower then youd think

judge saying "box" in court.  yeah im sure that happened. judges wont even utter the word "damn". they are very proper.

imaginary number fines $600, when you were just only in the car? they cant prove anything if you were just sitting there. and 600$ is some stupid fake assed number anyway

another lie from fruit20

 
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Posted: #40
Quote Originally Posted by LetsGoHORNS:

cool dude! i used to live in DC so i can relate! unfortuantely, thats a bad thing for you, becuase anyone that did would know this whole post is a giant lie. i love how you just said "20 years ago, and DC", a very arbitrary time period and our nations capital. what a coincidence!

"hooker row" this doenst exist, nor did it ever. prostitution is actually quite low in DC, alot lower then youd think

judge saying "box" in court.  yeah im sure that happened. judges wont even utter the word "damn". they are very proper.

imaginary number fines $600, when you were just only in the car? they cant prove anything if you were just sitting there. and 600$ is some stupid fake assed number anyway

another lie from fruit20


So, no prostitutes in D.C.?  What was that Marion Berry was smoking crack with in the hotel room in 1990?  A senator?  No, it was a prostitute you fucking asswipe.  Why would fruit lie about this?  No reason.  Why would you be such a dickhead?  You are what you eat.
 
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Posted: #41
i never said there were no prostitutes in DC, idiot.
i said the prostituion rate is a lot lower then youd think.
 
the poitn there was, there is no "hookers" row and everything he said in that above post was bullshit
 
ask anyone else from the metro DC area, they will tell you the exact same thing. so do your homework fuckhead.
 
go do some research  before you come at me, junior
 
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Posted: #42
no hooker storie but. when i was parting at local college.. i  met a chick ..blah blaah blah.. we went to her room and there was her roomate in her bed with here bf....well we went to town with them there.. and after a while of 4play..i was down on her and she asked me politely..to use 4 fingers???i was like uhhh?? ok?!!?..so i got 4 fingers inn her.. and she is going nuts..by now her roomate was blowing her bf.. it was all goin so well...i thought to myself...self..why not fist this chick.. i already had my hand in her massaging her vaginal wall...so i did..she was like UUUUGGGHH!! i will never 4get that sound...she was like are you fisting me???? i was like um yup!! her roommate started to laugh histerically. it was fun but messy. very messy.. this girl was a pig..she wanted me to fuck her and her roommate but not the bf...so i went back alone to the campus the next week for my first threesome!!!!!awesome boys awesome....
 
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Posted: #43
it was like throwing a hot dog down a hallway..the sex that is..but her friend was soo sexy...they both had tight rumps......mmm good
 
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Posted: #44
Horns is right here.  D.C. has an amazingly low hooker perecentage. You'd be concerned it was a cop more likely than not.
 
11th and K NW (yes 1 block) in D.C. is the only safe-haven for hookers in D.C. and there might be 5-10 girls out at the most at a given time.
 
 
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Posted: #45
Quote Originally Posted by LetsGoHORNS:

i never said there were no prostitutes in DC, idiot.
i said the prostituion rate is a lot lower then youd think.
 
the poitn there was, there is no "hookers" row and everything he said in that above post was bullshit
 
ask anyone else from the metro DC area, they will tell you the exact same thing. so do your homework fuckhead.
 
go do some research  before you come at me, junior

I see, so you had to move from D.C. because they didn't like tranny person on hooker row and you are still angry about having to leave a place with so much action.  I'm sure daddy took you back.
 
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Posted: #46
Quote Originally Posted by LetsGoHORNS:

i, unlike all the fucking idiots above, who laugh at everything udner the sun, find nothing funny in your post

there is actually no humor in this post nor is anything in it funny. in fact, to a normal person, youve been downgraded to the level of : Charlie Manson/creepy sex offender.
you are fucked up in the head

there are 3 types of people that post of these message boards:

-sick creepy assed motherfuckers who still live in mama's basement, and can be seen every night at 8pm with binoculars stalking and "peeping tomming" there 14 year old neighor
(penaty box nation)

- fat loser virgins

- degenerates who enjoy sports

Creepy fucker, you are all three. if anyone wonders why you dont have friends in real life, they can see this post!!

Relax horns... I see you are new here, at least using this sn.  Alos there is a reason there are very few women on this forum.  The idiot that posted that crap (and trust me I agree with your response.) is just an immature kid trying to rile up somebody, in which he/she succeeded.  People post stupid shit on here all day every day and you learn to deal with it in the same way you would with an idiot on the street.  Don't make eye contact and go about your business.  The one thing that a tool like that CANNOT STAND is for nobody to notice him.

Welcome to the forum

 
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Posted: #47

kingme

 
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Posted: #48
Guess I'm a boring guy... I don't have a hooker story.  Never tried, don't know if I will... but not ruling it out.
 
I think the whole condom thing would take me out of that.  I hate to use a condom - would really just rather rub one out myself.
 
condom sex =
 
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Posted: #49
Quote Originally Posted by LetsGoHORNS:

i never said there were no prostitutes in DC, idiot.
i said the prostituion rate is a lot lower then youd think.
 
the poitn there was, there is no "hookers" row and everything he said in that above post was bullshit
 
ask anyone else from the metro DC area, they will tell you the exact same thing. so do your homework fuckhead.
 
go do some research  before you come at me, junior
horns useem pretty nice and u seem to be a woman .. so i ask if you never used a prostitue then how the hell would you know hooker hang outs??? like your telling me you know every inch of the city?? especially in the down and dirty parts??? where a hooker ally would flourish??i find that hard to belive..also i find it hard to belive that a judge said box in court also..but how can you say that no judge would ever even think of sayin that.. is stupid.. like do u converse with judges on rgular basis???u think that he might have had a bad day ..we all have um.. and maybe has seen this same hooker in the court room 20 times maybe he was bitter and said what was on his mind??? its his court he can do what he wants... and last off..if you think your gonna come in here and out wit everyone your rudely mistaken... hun.....why are you even in this thread???sounds to me like you like to fight with me .. and your one of thoses women who think that girls can do anything that boys can do.... 
 
 
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Posted: #50
Quote Originally Posted by heatseeker2721:

horns useem pretty nice and u seem to be a woman .. so i ask if you never used a prostitue then how the hell would you know hooker hang outs??? like your telling me you know every inch of the city?? especially in the down and dirty parts??? where a hooker ally would flourish??i find that hard to belive..also i find it hard to belive that a judge said box in court also..but how can you say that no judge would ever even think of sayin that.. is stupid.. like do u converse with judges on rgular basis???u think that he might have had a bad day ..we all have um.. and maybe has seen this same hooker in the court room 20 times maybe he was bitter and said what was on his mind??? its his court he can do what he wants... and last off..if you think your gonna come in here and out wit everyone your rudely mistaken... hun.....why are you even in this thread???sounds to me like you like to fight with men .. and your one of thoses women who think that girls can do anything that boys can do.... 
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